October 21, 2009
by Valeree Dunn
Seeing Britney finally succeed and pull her act together is so refreshing. After waning and hitting rock bottom, Britney’s music is finally climaxing into something amazing; no pun intended.
Her comeback album “Blackout” was completely underrated, as to be expected. The “Circus” album finally made Britney’s comeback official, and her music has finally become more than a throwback to her youth.
“3” has a sexy pop sound typical of Britney’s music, but pulls out all the stops, making it easily the best song of the week. Her sex noises take away from ingenuity of the song, but when has Britney Spears ever been considered a serious artist? I haven’t heard anything so beautiful since “Hit Me Baby, One More Time.”
This rumor has become so rampant that even thirteen-year-olds have integrated the term “hermaphrodite” into their daily vocabulary.
One video in question features Gaga performing sans underwear.
But whether an alleged extra body part exists or not is not the point. Americans pride themselves on political correctness and acceptance. Even if this rumor is true, androgyny is just like any other fluke of nature. Who cares?
Despite what anyone says, Lady Gaga is incredibly beautiful and genuinely talented, in her own unique way. Sure, maybe her hedonistic performances bring to mind the apocalypse, but she’s something to look at. Her thighs are amazing, and that’s all I’m thinking about.
This is a movie comprised entirely of Jennifer Aniston-type actors: People with acting scopes so minimal that they never really play any character other than themselves. Jack Black and Michael Cera lead “Year One” playing out their typical caricatures, and the act is getting a little old.
Jack Black will always be Jack Black, brusque and unrefined, perpetuating the same tired joke--I’m unattractive, look at me.
And Michael Cera will always be Michael Cera--I’m awkward, look at me.
The previews to “Year One” looked hilarious, but despite a few interesting celebrity cameos, don’t bother. Unless you feel like throwing away a couple dollars for the rental, you’ve probably seen this one before anyway. It’s the one with Jack Black playing Jack Black.